robothearted

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I love Halloween so much. I think I must confuse the monsters, though, when I barrel headlong through haunted mazes or houses, because my reactions follow this pattern: jump and scream, giggle with delight, clap my hands like a child on Christmas morning, and then I say “thank you” as I move along.

(Source: vital-dust)

tastefullyoffensive:

[michaelholmes]

tastefullyoffensive:

[michaelholmes]

revelatory Wednesday

Things I realized today:

  • I think the reason I hate how I look with lots of makeup on is because it makes me look more like my evil aunt. (This is not a character or an alter ego - I have an evil aunt from whom I am estranged.)
  • Completely unintentionally, my nail polish exactly matched the design on my my shirt today. I didn’t even realize it till 2pm.
  • Pumpkin spice flavor doesn’t necessarily mean PUMPKIN flavor. WTF? I hate pumpkin stuff passionately (except Japanese pumpkin tempura) so the idea of all these pumpkin spice flavored things has always made me gag. Now I am just conflicted.
  • Thanks to amomenttothink, this morning I noticed my calendar is SO FRICKIN EMPTY for November. October has been an overwhelming blur, and I have already started adding things to December and January, but for some reason November is currently just tumbleweeds. AND I LIKE IT! Pretty much the only thing I wanna do is hang out with amomenttothink (and maybe Flaky) so I am gonna try to keep it clear. I predict that will last maybe five days.
  • Since the pro pictures from the wedding came out, I have been kind of creeped by the fact that I have ghostly white and perpetually bruised legs (my clumisness is the stuff of legend). When I asked B why he didn’t warn me how horrible they looked that day, he shrugged and said they just always look like that. Thanks. This morning, however, he sent me this pic of Jennifer Lawrence and said, “See? You’re not the only one!” I had looked at the same pic earlier and hadn’t even noticed her legs, so maybe no one is looking at mine either.
  • I am extremely excited about staying at a beach house in Morro Bay with my family this weekend, but it’s becoming increasingly obvious to me that I may throw down with my brother and sister in law at some point. I am not gonna get into it (I wrote about it last week and it was literally 10 scrolls long so I deleted it after I got it all out), but I am deeply disappointed, angry, and hurt about how they are handling my 3 year old nephew’s desires to be Elsa for Halloween. I am not going to be able to not say something to them about it this weekend, and it’s gonna suck.
  • The toilet paper in the restrooms at my office comes in GIGANTIC rolls and although I have been in this building for over a year, I hadn’t ever seen that before. There’s no hole, just an indentation, and the whole tp disc slides into the holder from the bottom. A) How have I never seen it empty before and B) How am I the only one who attempted to refill it? It was 10am! No one else went in there and took it upon themselves to look for a refill?

Bonus: Not a revelation but confirmation. Even when people are going through HORRIBLE things privately in their relationships, they feel the need to pretend they are the perfect couple on social media. Why bother saying anything at all? It’s fascinating. Maybe that’s why I really like Tumblr best - seems like ya’ll keep it real, and I feel privileged to be a part of it.

tastefullyoffensive:

[explosm]

tastefullyoffensive:

[explosm]

(Source: explosm)

(Source: morgenstern)

tastefullyoffensive:

[jimbenton]

tastefullyoffensive:

[jimbenton]

larstheyeti:

happy wednesday
http://theawkwardyeti.com

larstheyeti:

happy wednesday

http://theawkwardyeti.com

(Source: hotghostcalendar)